Back to the Philippines

From the beginning, I have talked about our business plans here as one of the main purpose for going back to the Philippines.
Starting a business is complicated enough, and being in business with a family member such as a spouse could make things a bit more sensitive. We need to clearly define the division of labor and also our way of decision making. The thing is, we both have a good background in the software development industry and it seems to be the natural thing to do since it is both our biggest dream which is to start and grow a thriving international software development firm. For me, it was just a dream that stayed at the back of my mind while I dedicated the last 12 years helping other companies become successful. We both did that already. I think it’s about time we do it for ourselves. In my other article Interview with a Startup, the American guy also served as an inspiration to me that the time is really now.

But then, maybe our preparation timeline is quite unrealistically short after all. We still need to talk about our roles in the business. I would like him to see me as his equal and I wanted to be assured that he trusts my technical abilities as well as dedication to our business. I also want to know if this synergy between us will continue in the workplace as I hoped it would be. I want our working relationship to be both professional and fun at the same time. We can be both like Mulder and Scully and Jim and Pam at the same time, can’t we?. I have worked with lots of men in this field and one of the most irritating experiences involved men with large egos and those who underestimate my capabilities. But on the other hand, I have seen myself work in a team environment with great synergy with my peers both men and women alike. I would like to be respected as much as I respect others. And this time, I want to run the show as much as he does. I just hope we can always reach a compromise at all times without emotions hurt. And certainly I don’t want our disagreements to even reach home.

Some of the questions that linger in my mind are:

Is it possible for a Husband-Wife Team to become successful entrepreneurs? Will our married life suffer if we enter into a high-stress business such as IT?

I just read several articles about husbands and wives starting up their business and that now I am considering finding a therapist or coach who does family business counseling. MrC (the hubby), had suggested we should draft some kind of agreement on a smart exit strategy in case it all blows up because either one of us wants to be out of the business or worse (knock on wood) the relationship. We don’t even want to imagine that this might happen but we want to be protected from personal financial disasters should these things happen. The important points I picked up from these articles include the following:

• Always put your relationship first and set boundaries
• Don’t let work become your life. Remember to play together as well.
• Communication and commitment is key
• Working together puts an added strain on your relationship

We tend to view the business as our baby. We are of course still open and aiming to also become parents of a real human baby but as of now, with or without one it is okay for both of us. There are pressures from family and some people around to push us to have a family but that’s not as simple as it seems biologically and practically at this time and that is another issue that is outside of the confines of this blog.

Now at least I feel a bit relieved that I have now expressed what I feel now and that this is one of my major fears coupled with the idea of leaving our existing “stable” situation here and then putting up a startup in another country with so much uncertainty. And by the way, to update you about my job woes, right now everything has totally turned for good. It’s like I started in a new company. They have done a great deal in making things better for me such as hiring additional competent staff and it makes all the difference in the world. My interest and energy has come back in my job that now the whole perspective has changed. Keep posted for more articles on my ever swaying moods about life here in the Netherlands and my ever-indecisive female mind concerning moving to the Philippines. It is after all an open idea, the plan is there but as it not set in stone things can evolve in really strange way. If it is your first time to read this blog, I encourage you to visit the blog regularly to see how this plan evolves. All comments and suggestions are appreciated.

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• Taking a break from Work
• Tempted
• Stressed with Work Again
• I resigned
• Possible risks
• Mixed Feelings
• Follow the money or let it follow you
• Interview with a Startup