The past few days we have both been busy trying to research what structure is appropriate for our business and have been working on our business plan. Later, we ended up concluding that this will not be “our business” but it will only be his. The first reason is quite clear: working together is not the best setup for us. It’s painful to think but I think we are just too different in how we work plus I am quite afraid that being together the whole day and having to go home with the same person is not very healthy for our relationship and for me personally. I need to have my own space to grow and not be watched by someone who I would eventually see again at home. Right now, if I messed up something at work at least when I go home I know I can relax and forget about it and see my home as a haven of rest but if we work together there will be no space and breather!
I guess that’s the deal-breaker. The second major thing is that his business partner finds that having us together as owners in the same company spells imbalance in the control of the direction of the business. They have both worked hard to develop their business for over a year already and having me there seems like not the right thing to do and besides.. didn’t I say earlier like you know.. when I started this blog that I wanted to have SABBATICAL. That was one of my main goals of choosing to move back to the Philippines. That will be a time for me not only to rest but to explore my interests, skills and develop myself free from any care or expectations from anyone. I think that is the way to go for me. However, I can foresee that my sabbatical will not take that long and soon I will discover something really cool for me to do. Of course, the only thing I can see myself doing right now is to be an IT professional/consultant and starting my own outsourcing company is always a dream that I would like to pursue but I think I should restrain myself from pushing myself too soon and then risk getting myself burned out again.
On the other hand, we both know and acknowledge that with this new big undertaking both of us should benefit and not just only one. We are in the process of coming up a plan or deal that in the end benefits both of us. In the next posts I hope this will be clear. I am after all giving up a pretty good job that pays well enough and an okay situation that I would probably miss from time to time. It’s a challenging job and has its ups and down but overall it’s a career and I do not see myself giving up on my personal dreams and ambitions for nothing.
And regarding our upcoming trip we have been slowly developing our itinerary as well for our upcoming visit. Later, we would be making appointments with some interesting people we’d like to meet as well as family of course. Only a few more weeks and we’re there !!
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5 responses so far ↓
1 Dan Mihaliak // Jul 13, 2008 at 10:26 pm
Although I dont know the both of you, the reasons you give for not working together are exactly what other couples have found out the hard way. It’s good you figured it out before you got into it.
2 rob // Jul 17, 2008 at 4:14 pm
I found that a month or more back in the Philippines, I had to adjust my plans a bit to fit it more to the environment. At least in my experience, I observed that I had developed a ‘blind spot’ from being away too long, and the blind spot is only fixed after several months of living back here.
And yes, I fully agree with what you said about taking it easy to avoid getting burned out again. The past few months, I’ve been taking it easy in the local office, with occasional short bursts of extreme busyness, but always reminding myself that I need to relax and take it easy (after all, it’s the reason why I came back home in the first place).
So it would be good to continue to observe and let your plans develop and evolve, once you get a grasp of the opportunities available and what it’s like being back home again.
3 mixxy // Jul 22, 2008 at 5:24 pm
Hi Rob,
thanks for the insight.
i am curious.. can you tell me more about this blind spot you just mentioned?
4 rob // Jul 26, 2008 at 4:45 pm
Mixxy, the blind spots I realized I had were rooted in my assuming that the things I used to enjoy doing while in the US, I would also continue to enjoy while in the Philippines. For instance, before I arrived home, I had planned on being more active in blogging (particularly the Philippines-related topics in PhilippineVoyager site), then I realized I just didn’t have the time for that, as I was too preoccupied with other things.
I also had other things planned, such as starting a podcast and developing some personal web-related projects with friends, but those didn’t pan out as I had earlier envisioned because there’s just too much more interesting things to do here.
Other source of blind spots would be the environmental factors of life back home (it is easy to underestimate them). For instance, the warmer weather, especially for someone like me coming from the sunnyless Seattle area, made me want to go outside at every opportunity as I felt I had been deprived of the sun for many years. The traffic is also much more different than what it was five years ago. Today, Call Centers are widely prevalent, so you have people coming into work at Makati and Ortigas at 10 PM. This means that there is less of a ‘rush hour’ during peak times, and it struck me as odd that I would be sitting in a packed bus in EDSA traffic past 10 PM. I had to adjust my plans and frame of thought based on the various changes that occured the past few years. I still chat with Filipino friends who stayed abroad and get some flashes of the way I used to think before I had arrived home. And I would be amazed at how different my mindset is now than the way it was four months ago.
5 zylla // Aug 5, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Hi Mixxy…I’m back from the Philippines and finally finding time to be on the computer again, which I had little urge to use while I was there. It’s 5:30am CA time, and I think I’m just starting to get tired as my body clock is telling me it’s just 8:30pm Philippine time.
It’s difficult to come back here as my heart is still in the Philippines…despite all odds! Good luck in your upcoming trip.
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